Something borrowed

Tonight I am alone, for the first time in a long time. It was not requested and I have fought against it, through endless dinner parties and birthday parties and catching ups and party after party after film night to rest for more parties. I’d craved aloneness, without knowing that very craving was why I was hiding in the abyss of others. My secret self was dreading it, as perhaps it knew (It always does), what it might bring. Self reflection is terrifying, always. But sitting calmly, doing only that which I love and understand, alone, I wonder how I could avoid for so long the thing which keeps me sane, slightly together, not toppling off cliffs of uncertainty- suddenly I crave perfect stasis and wish to remain now, forever. I have been hiding from everything in the maze of a social network I care little for- stalking and rendering rather than engaging in any meaningful way with myself or others. I had become lost in the dirge of my own boredom with myself. But tonight I am quiet and filled with silent hope for more quiet.

So I’ve finally given myself the time to acknowledge that, we are always, of course, ourselves- no-one can make us that which we are not. It’s so easy to blame others for our grievances- when our peace is disturbed, the search for intruders begins, but more often than not, there is nothing there- just broken promises we made and forgot, made and forgot. I could easily blame anybody else for my disappointment at not having this peace earlier- commitments, my partner, my friends, technology, the burden of social contracts which make me feel as though I must always be a ready, willing, slavering participant in my own life- an endless parade of banners telling you that if you rest for even a second you are failing to realise your potential- NO SPECTATORS. IF YOU’RE NOT LIVING ON THE EDGE YOU’RE TAKNG UP SPACE. GET BUSY LIVING OR GET BUSY DYING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Nobody said you had to pay attention to the screaming lunacy of the masses, though it’s easy to say you can’t help it.

Have the courage to tell everyone to go to Hell.

 

 

Mistakes I’ve Made

Abiding cold men.

That’s about it.

Patti

I can’t drag my ass up

to figure out what’s up, to dream big, to herald anything

of significance (who goes where? Who cares?),

to decipher weakness that culminates

in nothing but broken glass.

There’s no broken hearts; they come later.

It’s Christmas you think, shouldn’t we get along? For the sake of the season

since we ourselves can rarely find a reason.

It’s as good as any.

 I cannot do any more today than look at pictures of

Patti Smith and try to figure out how to get my

fire lit.

Jason’s Jellyfish tattoo

Deer Tattoos

This a mother and daughter ‘set’ of tattoos I did at the Adelaide Fringe show last year. They wanted matching work done but both like different styles so here we have two very different deer- it was lovely working with them both.

 

New Copper Jewellery

My new copper medallions have been coming along a treat. Please write to me about them if you like them- I am very interested in making them custom for people.

These particular pieces are influenced by my time in the desert…mad, mottled confusion. But beautiful, oh so beautiful. It is a wonderful alchemy to condense an experience into an object. These are so precious to me- they sum up everything.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Harvest Festival – I Really Need You Tonight

I was recently commissioned to create a new sculptural work for the Harvest Festival in Melbourne. Whenever I make work for music festivals, I always like it to involve music in some way. The festival organisers were after large works which would have a lot of visual impact, so I thought why not create another huge text piece- a snippet of a song whose meaning could change depending on your mood or perspective, or who you think the message is coming from. Similar to my work, ‘Imagine Me & You, I Do,’ I created ‘I Really Need You Tonight,’ which is an excerpt from the epic tear jerker/interpretive get up on the table and dance starter, ‘Total Eclipse of the Heart,’ by Bonnie Tyler.

Its message goes between a mixture of despair and hope, of knowing and uncertainty- I like this play on frailty, especially in the context of a 15,000 strong crowd- whose expectations will mix, whose will meet and whose will falter? I like the thought of the work influencing decisions, or strengthening convictions perhaps- it added a mood of love to the crowd which was uplifting.

I was told by numerous people that they had taken a photo of it and sent it to their partners or friends who weren’t there. Many people kissed in front of it and took their pictures. I heard also of a huge mass sing along, but unfortunately I was watching The Flaming Lips so I didn’t get to see it…I love to make work which promotes togetherness, fleeting moments of joy.

Standing next to it and watching Portishead- who I have been waiting to see for many, many years was a truly moving and wonderful experience. I couldn’t really believe it was happening for a while- standing next to my own work and listening to Glory Box- completely magical. I felt like I knew who I was and that I am really achieving what I want in life, slowly but surely.

Here are some pics, going from the making through to the night. Enjoy.

Many thanks to my prep and install team, without whom none of it would have been possible:

Holly Preston

Sam Woud

Ash Easton

Linus Norman

Tom Hall

Glenn McGrath

Joel Zika

and Mark Godoy- you’re all champions

Photography of the production phase was taken by Sam Woud and the rest were by myself.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

(some of the letters got stolen?!?!)

Portrait of Tom’s Tattoos

Here we’ll have a little journey through some of Tom’s tatts that I’ve done, including my most recent one.  Tom actually taught me how to tattoo, and all my very first bits of ink are on him, so they’re pretty special- we also have a lot of secret tatts dedicated to each other (one of the reasons I never ask people what their tattoos mean) so we’ve got a bond over permanent scarring. Tom very patiently taught me everything he knew, and I will never be able to thank him enough for giving me something I love so much.

This squid is about the third or fourth tatt I ever did, around three years ago- and my first ever attempt at shading. After this I got asked for a lot of squids and I got damned sick of them.

The above two are cover-ups…sort of. When I do a cover up, I like to leave as much of the original in as possible- simply to change its meaning.  So we added the Hawaiian print to the gun and I gave this creepy girl some embellishments in the form of a mask and patterns- though this piece remains very much unfinished.

I love the sneaking bat. It was drawn by my friend Leighton Kelly who is an absolutely fantastic illustrator. As soon as Tom saw it he wanted it, and it remains one of the most popular pieces I’ve done.

This is Tom’s hand- this was the second time I’d attempted the dot shading style and it works so beautifully here, especially on the skull inside the beetle’s back.

This fantastic hand is the start of a much larger concept piece we have for covering Tom’s arm…couldn’t wait to start sharing it though- the hand will feature a tattoo of a goat head when it is finished- really excited about doing that one- just the kind of creepy thing I love to work with.

There’s the man himself…

And here’s my thanks. Much love.

Songs That Say All the Things You Need To Say But Don’t Have the Words To Do it

Been feeling down and out these last few weeks. Whenever I get like this, I just can’t seem to listen to music- I tend to skip halfway through everything cos nothing is quite making it there- looking for that feeling, that one mood which will both elevate and alleviate this funk I’m in. Been getting obsessive with Tom Waits, but his particular brand of drunken swagger doesn’t quite sum this up- I’m not swaggering, that’s for sure…more waiting in the corner for the tremors to turn into something more substantial. I put this song on today and it said everything I needed it to. Full of doubt and conviction, all at once, nothing with precedence- everything a truthful lie- just keep telling yourself it’s true.

Never As Tired As When I’m Waking Up- LCD Soundsystem

Wasted and complacent
and you about the same
but still i want to get it
on with you tonight
when i was a little boy
i laid down in the grass
i’m sure you’d feel the same 
if i could fuck you here tonight

but i’m never as tired as when i’m waking up
i’m never as tired as when i’m waking up
but it feels like i’m in love again
oh it feels like i’m in love again
though it feels like i’m in love again
with what you do

if we made it happen
i’m sure what we would do
run outside and fuck someone
to show it didn’t mean a thing
seems it could be simple
if i could just grow up
never gonna get it now
cause i’ll never grow

but i’m never as tired as when i’m waking up
i’m never as tired as when i’m waking up
but it feels like i’m in love again
oh it feels like i’m in love again
though it feels like i’m in love again
with what you do

but not with you
(keep on telling myself it’s true)
but not with you
(keep on telling myself it’s true)
but not with you
(keep on telling myself it’s true)
but not with you
(keep on telling myself it’s true)
but not with you
(keep on telling myself it’s true)
but not with you
(just keep on telling myself it’s true)
but not with you
(just keep on telling myself it’s true)
but not with you
(just keep on telling myself it’s true)

Rob’s Pigeon Tattoo